Relate… and suddenly you are swimming in the waters of unification.
There invariably comes a time in many of our lives when we are forced to ask ourselves what “serves us”, particularly regarding the matter of relationship. We move through our lives making friends, lovers, acquaintances, business contacts… an endless stream of meetings, greetings, connections and partings. We all have had the experience of discovering that ideal simpatico camaraderie, sharing similar likes and dislikes. There is that perfect rush of totally connecting through dynamic dialogue, mutual inspiration, and just plain being comfortable together.
But, what happens when all of that relating begins to break down - when we start to feel the threat of a history unraveling? Gradually (or suddenly, in some cases), we begin to feel things differently: maybe we’re not being heard or feeling misunderstood, there are lapses in communication and not as much time spent together… what exactly is it that moves the relationship to this next, almost inevitable, phase? Time? Personal growth? Geographical distance? Most likely, if we look more closely, we can see it has been brewing for longer than we may care to see. And it is perhaps here we see the cold, hard fact —truly: “nothing lasts forever”.
Learning to let go of relationships that no longer feed us, or contribute to our overall inner growth, is a hard nut to swallow and is perhaps even a time to grieve— as we are saying goodbye to teachers who have helped shape us into the very beings we embody today. But, to paraphrase Woody Allen: “Relationships are like sharks– they have to keep moving forward in order to survive…” And with that said, some of us may find ourselves relating to his final thought on the matter: “I think what we have here is a dead shark.”
Keep it moving forward, or move on.
Blessings and peace.
Greetings and Sat Nam! from
- Lady Guru
- Thanks for clicking in. If you feel inspired by the the idea of living your truth and shining your light through life AND work, then you are in the right place. Arjuna Ardagh coined the phrase “translucent business” in his book, The Translucent Revolution: How People Like You Are Waking Up and Changing The World, stating: “Translucent business, of which there are many now, have multiple bottom lines. And the most common combination of bottom lines is called “people-planet-profit.” The primary motive for a business is people, to serve the people within the business, to serve the customer.” Journey with us as we learn and create the process of building Lady Guru’s Translucent Business. I hope as we move down this path together, you find your own Lady Guru - your own Truth - and bring that to light in whatever you do. SIGN UP FOR WEEKLY BLOG POSTINGS AT: info@LadyGuru.com
7 comments:
I have had to deal with quite a few dead sharks of my own in my life. But I think that, rather than "relationships that no longer feed us, or contribute to our overall inner growth..." it might be better to describe these relationships as no longer being MUTUALLY beneficial. One might find oneself in a one-sided relationship. I've found myself on both sides of that coin, although I do have to admit, most of the time it was I who was trying to "feed the shark," and the shark just wasn't eating. (I love that analogy, by the way). I believe that people come into our lives for a reason, but some are meant to be there for a very long time, perhaps til death (in this life, anyway), and others a shorter time. It's always sad when you realize, after unsuccessfully trying to "move forward," that it's finally time to "move on." We can only hope to do it with grace, and give the shark a respectful goodbye. Wonderful and wise post, my grace-ful sister.
That is great kajisan, sat nam! I once had someone make reference to the way some of the people in my life had been "left behind". There was clearly an intent to try to make me feel less than, in that I was, in their
eyes the kind of person who "could not hold onto friends." I found this at first perplexing, considering I still have some dear friends from as far back as middle
school. Yet, I have experienced over the years, how we all change, seems I change a lot, and that like a favorite shoe that just nags, pulls or doesn't fit, that some relationships, just don't work anymore. Sometimes that has ended dramatically, in the past, but over the last 10 years, it has been more of a quiet drifting away, with brief spontaneous reunions. Until finally, there may be just a shadow of what was there. I like that, because it does not feel so harsh. I can always cherish the love we shared from our times together, but I realize that it is not a "bad thing" that we just may not fit together any longer. It has made me a whole lot more understanding, accepting and loving towards all, and for that, I am grateful.
I feel the worst we can do to ourselves and our "friends" is to be false in a friendship, just because of that history. We must live our Sat Nam, but we can learn to do it with kindness, grace and understanding, and no one is right or wrong, it is just who we are, and maybe the fit is off, now.
love dejisan
wise words from Wise Women.
thank you, my friends, for sharing your own truths so openly!
Hey, hope this is nothing personal! (just kidding) The cool thing is, you start to attract new fishes, and the old TYPE don't come round anymore. How cool is that! Hugs, Robin
This verse has been sent in email form many times; I think it nicely speaks to your thoughts. Thanks, as always, for opening the door to new ponderings.
Suzy
Oops....here it is:
People come into our lives for a reason, a season or a Lifetime!
When someone or something is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to
meet a need you have expressed (either consciously or unconsciously) .
They may help you through a difficult time, to provide you with guidance
and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, financially or
spiritually. Other times people or situations have been sent along to
challenge you and ask you to "step up to the mark", to realise how strong
you are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without
any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will
say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they
die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take
a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire
fulfilled, their work is done.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to
share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you
laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give
you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a
season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build
upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept
the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all
other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind
but friendship is clairvoyant.
It may not always be apparent to you at first as to which category they
fit into. But always trust that there is a purpose to your experience.
When you know which one it is, you will know what choices to make, what to
do for that person or whether to keep them/it in your life, or whether it
is time to let go and allow it to move out of your life
Hi... your sister directed me to your blog :o). (She also sent you my poem a few weeks ago... The Nesting, thanks for the comments about it by the way!) Anyway, I have really enjoyed looking through your blog. You seem to have a good deal of insight and thoughtful ideas, I enjoyed reading it. It has been interesting for me to consider the idea of "dead sharks" especially referring to some past relationships. I think we're taught to believe that there is something wrong or bad when a friendship ends... but it is relieving to think that maybe sometimes, that it is just meant to be.
I also very much understand your experience in "unhappy anniversary" and often marvel at our bodies ability to understand the cycles of time. I have unfortunately had many "opportunities" to experience the anniversary event... as difficult as it is, I guess it truly is amazing how our bodies work, gotta try and look at the bright side huh! :o)
I've been trying to vlog on youtube... my channel is myblueart if you have the time and would like to take a look sometime.
OH... and I looked at the shadow project too, beautiful artwork, I really liked it. I couldn't get the video version to download for some reason, but Toni described it to me and it sounded very cool. Sounds a bit like things I think about too!
many blessings to you!
Tania
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